How to Approach a Girl

Tips for Approaching Girls

Plan what you'll say in advance to eliminate awkwardness.
Plan what you'll say in advance to eliminate awkwardness.
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Group dates are a low-pressure way to get to know a girl. Try orchestrating a group outing so you can spend more time with her. This will also give you a chance to see how she acts around her friends. This is important because if she's a completely different person, she's probably not being honest about who she is when she's with you.

A group date also gives you an opportunity to gauge your own personality. If you're mildly jealous about how much fun a girl has when she's with longtime guy friends, that's probably normal. If, however, you become angry, paranoid and convinced they're going to "steal" her from you, then you've got work to do. Unless you tame the green monster, you'll end up alienating her and fighting over far-fetched scenarios. Instead, work on your own self-confidence and self-control. Don't let your imagination get the best of you

There's always room in a relationship for texting, but it shouldn't be used to plan a first date, or deliver really good or bad news. For example, don't text her to announce that you think you're falling in love -- or that you like another girl better. The same rules apply to Facebook or e-mail in general. We recognize it often feels more comfortable to text than call, but until you've really spent a lot of time together, stick to talking in person or on the phone. It takes more than 140 characters at a time to develop a relationship.

It also takes practice to approach girls. The process is a bit like playing a sport-- the more you practice, the better you get at it. There may be some rejection along the way, but in the end, you'll be glad you tried.

Related Articles


  • Cape, Anthony. "Overcoming Jealousy in Relationships." (Oct. 1, 2010)
  • Griffin, Matt. "Relationship Rules: Text Messaging." (Oct. 1, 2010)
  • Marshall, Lisa. "How to End a Conversation." Nov. 21, 2008. (Oct. 1, 2010)
  • Muller, Heidi. "The Subtle Pickup." (Oct. 1, 2010)
  • Ponton, Lynn. "Building Self-Esteem." (Oct. 1, 2010)
  • Smith, Curt. "Overcome Your Fear of Rejection." (Oct. 1, 2010)
  • Tattersall, Mike. "How to Tell if a Girl Likes You." (Oct. 1, 2010)